Songs classic rock radio needs to forget, No. 1

1. Anything by Eddie Money. I’m cheating a bit, but it’s my damn list. Let me ask you this: Have you ever heard these words: “Up next, Eddie Money, by request”? No, you haven’t. Here’s why: Baby Hold On, Two Tickets To Paradise, Take Me Home Tonight, Shakin’, etc. The only people requesting these songs are A) on Money’s payroll and want to keep cashing checks, and B) Money’s family, who are afraid if the classic rock royalties dry up, Eddie will want to sleep on their couch. No big-time rock star is ever going to say, “I was really inspired by Think I’m In Love.” No one’s conceiving their children to I Wanna Go Back. No one wants to hear this guy anymore. And if they do, they’re paying the $5 entrance fee at the Jay County Fair and checking out the horror live. Cut him off. Make the world a better place … of course, radio programmers would probably just play more Foreigner in his place, so I’m not sure why I’m even trying.

Why you’d want to, I have no idea:

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